How do I Stop Myself from Repeating the Past?
How do I cope with relapse? I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety in 2018, and went on 4 different medications until I found the right one.
For about a year I have been doing so great. But, recently, I have felt myself using my old thinking patterns and behaviours. I can’t help thinking that I’m going back to how I was. Tears, hospital trips, breakdowns, sleepless nights. I don’t want that again. How do I change this? If it does happen, how do I cope? Thank you so much.
Ellie, 17 years old
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When someone tells me they are worried about going back and repeating the mistakes of their past, or being the person they were before, my first response is always the same:
You can never really go back to being the person you were before, because you have changed since then.
Every day, our bodies change. We shed cells and get older.
Every day, our minds change as we grow and learn more about ourselves and the world. We constantly have new experiences and understandings that change who we are.
This means you have changed from the girl you were two years ago.
Yes, you may have some old patterns coming up. But you can see them for what they are now. You have a greater understanding of where they come from, how to manage them and who you can go to for help. You have learned those things. You have done the work on yourself. No one else. You.
You are not the same girl you were before, so let that fear go. You don’t need it.
Secondly, it sounds like you’ve had to be really strong to get where you are. Hold onto that strength and know that whatever comes you will deal with it. You will move through it because you are strong and courageous. I can feel that about you.
Setbacks happen in life and it can feel like you’ve gone two steps forward and three steps back. It’s frustrating but, in reality, it is just another step in your journey. Sometimes we need to revisit parts of ourselves or things in our past to clear them properly.
You know what to do this time. Reach out and get the support you need. There is no shame in asking for help. Do the things that work for you. And if they’ve stopped working, change things.
Have faith in your ability to keep going. I believe in you.
Lots of love,
Got a question?
Lucretia gives honest and practical advice to help you choose the best path for you. It’s all about taking the filters off and helping young women value themselves more. Click the button to ask your question today!
Lucretia’s guidance should be regarded as personal opinion only and does not constitute qualified, professional advice regarding psychological situations. If you require this type of advice, please seek the services of a professional in that field.